Friendships fulfil a deep human need for connection and belonging. They provide emotional support, helping individuals navigate life’s challenges, and contribute to both mental and physical health: reducing feelings of loneliness and isolation, fostering a sense of purpose and boosting self-esteem, lowering stress levels, improving heart health and releasing endorphins.
It can, however, be tricky managing these relationships at work – especially if you’re the boss. While you know that being liked can make the job a lot easier, finding the balance between respect and friendship in the workplace can be hard to achieve.
When co-workers feel a sense of camaraderie, they are more likely to share ideas
Supportive environment
While making friends at work involves balancing personal connections with professional boundaries, workplace friendships can create a more enjoyable and supportive environment, making day-to-day tasks feel less stressful.
These bonds often foster collaboration and open communication, which can improve team dynamics and overall productivity. When co-workers feel a sense of camaraderie, they are more likely to share ideas, offer help and work together effectively.
I am a better leader because I have cultivated good friendships inside and outside the business
Bossing it
There are a couple of common fallacies about boss-employee friendships that often get repeated:
- ‘Don’t get too close to your employees; they will lose respect for you and the business will suffer.’
- ‘You won’t have any time for friendships when you start the business; it’ll take all your time to keep your head above water.’
I disagree with both. Friendships between bosses and employees can create a more open, trusting and collaborative work environment. When a leader builds genuine connections, it fosters loyalty, boosts morale, and encourages employees to feel comfortable sharing ideas or concerns. These relationships can lead to better communication, greater engagement and a sense of shared purpose, all of which contribute to a healthier workplace culture.
Personally, I am a better leader and have a better business because I have cultivated good friendships inside and outside the business.
Friendships between bosses and employees can create a more trusting work environment
Although the dynamic can be complex and requires careful management to maintain professionalism and fairness, business leaders can have friendships at work.
Top tips
Here is some advice on friendships – in and out of the workplace:
- Take stock of the friendships in your life. Be honest when considering if any of your existing relationships are not nourishing you. Which are fixable? Which are not? Be clear about any relationships you need to withdraw from.
- Take note of the good friendships you have. Write down the names, and be thankful for those people and those relationships. Do you keep in touch as much as you should? If not, do something about it.
- If you don’t have enough of these types of friendship, don’t be afraid to look for new ones within your workplace. But don’t expect to form close friendships with everyone at work.
- Think about the kind of friend you are. Would you be friends with you? If not, work on the improvements you’d like to see.
Note of caution
However, there are significant challenges when bosses form friendships with their employees. One key concern is the perception of favouritism. If other team members believe that a boss favours a ‘friend’ in decisions about promotions, assignments or evaluations, it can lead to resentment and undermine team cohesion.
Even if no favouritism exists, the mere appearance of bias can damage the leader’s credibility and the trust of the broader team. For example, if one of the members of the leadership team is a close friend of the CEO, it would be natural for the CEO to align him or herself to the opinions of that person if there was a disagreement within the team about a decision. Clearly it would be important to not do this and to remain objective. Or if a manager were mentoring someone within the business who was in another team and the relationship became a friendship, the mentee might be tempted to go to the friend-manager with work issues rather than going to their own boss.
It is therefore crucial to maintain transparency, fairness and clear boundaries.
